She's pretty good with a pen and paper for not having thumbs

My roommates and I received a wonderful letter and gift this week. Someone sneaked it into my car as I was packing it up to leave Augusta and head back to school. Inside of a gift bag was a beautifully wrapped box containing a tin of lemon straws. There was a card included with the gift inside a gold lined envelope on embossed border stationary written in beautiful cursive penmanship. At first I thought it was from Mama, but after reading I discovered the "true" author of the letter. It reads:

"My dear young ladies,

I would like to humbly apologize for my "indiscretions" during my recent stay in your lovely home. You were so gracious to allow me to visit, yet I repaid your kindness with repugnant manner and inexcusable actions. I was not raised to behave so.

I first sought to blame the aforementioned behavior on a touch of the swine flu. But now having had time to reflect upon my comportment during that week, I realize that I must accept full responsibility. Away at University for the first time, far from the watchful eyes of my parents, I fear that succumbed to youthful recklessness and rebellion. However, rather than gaining the "freshman fifteen" from excesses of beer and wine, I left my freshman fifteen on your parlor floor.

I now beg your forgiveness and hope that you will accept this small repayment for the anguish and disgust that I surely caused each of you. My sincere hope is that any lingering memories or me not be of the odoriferous kind.

Most sincerely yours,

S. Potato Roupe"

In case you don't remember, Tater (Sweet Potato aka S. Potato Roupe) came to visit for about a month ago for a week and poo pooed on the den floor in front of the TV 6 or 7 times throughout the week. It was ridiculous.

Someone was mighty clever to write this note and send a gift. We all got a kick out of it.